💬 finding a therapist is a lot like dating

real talk on finding the right therapist, affordable ways to feel put together, and the only brunch recipe you need.

Subscribe here | Unsubscribe here | Wellness Wed Apr 23, 2025 ✅ Today's Checklist:  Finding a therapist = dating (Carri gets it) Thania shares budget-friendly wardrobe upgrades The Blueberry French Toast Casserole you need to try 🤔 Trivia: What is the only planet in our solar system to rotate clockwise on its axis? Find out. QUICK LINKS 🧠 This list? Your cheat code for team engagement. 💸 The gender pay gap isn't just about paychecks—it's about time, trade-offs, and systemic setup. 📱 ADHD TikTok might feel relatable, but it's not a replacement for real diagnosis. 🤖 These ChatGPT side hustles are so smart, we're mad we didn't think of them first. MENTAL HEALTH     "Swiping Left" on My First Few (6) Therapists Was the Best Thing I Did Finding a good therapist is weirdly similar to dating. Of course, I didn't realize this at first—I thought I'd pick one from the list of "approved providers" on my insurance company's website, show up, unpack 30+ years of baggage, and walk away an emotionally evolved woman. 🚨Spoiler alert: that's not actually how it works. My Ex List 👎 She was 70ish, nodded a lot, and asked, "So, how does that make you feel?" on loop, followed by more nodding and some notes. It felt more like sitting in a musty basement with a very conservative preacher's wife for an hour, and I found myself wondering why I was even there. We broke up after three dates. 👎 I thought maybe I needed someone more direct—someone who could really tell me what to do (cuz we all know that's how therapy works 🤦‍♀️). He was > 40 and reminded me a little of a less submissive Bobby Bacala from The Sopranos. I never felt unsafe, but he was a very large man with a very large and looming presence that left me feeling anxious about speaking. We made it two dates. After a few more mismatches, it hit me—you're not just looking for credentials—you're looking for chemistry. Why does this sound so familiar? Because, just like dating, therapy requires a connection. We need to feel heard, safe, and maybe even a little bit challenged. Play The Field 📆 Most therapists offer consultations—use them. Ask questions, be honest, and don't be afraid to say, "I don't think this is a good fit." Just like in dating, we're not ghosting people—we're setting boundaries. 🎯 Have an idea of what kind of help you're looking for. Someone who specializes in trauma? Who's culturally competent? Direct? Soft-spoken? Religious? Be honest about your true needs and goals—just like you would with a partner. 🧐 Don't settle. A therapist that "looks good on paper" doesn't mean they're right for you. Trust your gut; if something feels off, it probably is. Keep looking. Therapy can be a pretty intimate experience ± you're opening up some of the messiest parts of your life. You deserve someone who gets it. So, take your time. Swipe left on the ones you don't vibe with and—like dating—you'll "just know" when it's right. Carri (TA Copywriter) LEADERSHIP TOOLS     Burnout Isn't a Badge of Honor—It's a Red Flag   The Sunday Night Panic is real. You know the feeling. It's 9PM. You're staring at your calendar. 15 unread Slack pings. 4 deadlines breathing down your neck. 2 team members waiting on feedback. That one client follow-up you keep forgetting. Your chest tightens. Because somewhere between being a leader and doing the work…everything started falling through the cracks. But here's the truth: You're not failing. You're just trying to hold a business together in your brain—and that's not sustainable. Real wellness starts with systems that support you. Here's your burnout-buffering leadership toolkit: 🗂️ Salesforce CRM: Track every deal, conversation, and contact from one dashboard. Stay proactive with your clients without the follow-up fatigue. 🎫 Zoho Help Desk: Centralize support requests and automate your ticketing workflow. No more missed messages or mental tabs—just calm, clear customer service. 📊 monday.com: Project management that makes progress visible (and delegation easier). You'll stop carrying the weight of every task and start working with flow. 📥 Bill.com: Handle invoices and approvals without last-minute scrambling. Because financial wellness is a big part of your wellness too. 🧠 Notion: Organize your thoughts, plans, and team docs in one calming command center. It's like clearing digital clutter from your brain—and your desktop. 🌐 Squarespace: Create a stunning, professional website—no code, no stress. Perfect for launching that dream project or polishing your online presence. You don't need more willpower. You need systems that help you breathe. Take care of your team by taking care of your workflow—and yourself. FASHION     Leveling Up Your Wardrobe Without Breaking The Bank I'm a fashion girly…but I'm also not. I like looking cute. I appreciate a good outfit. But designer labels? $600 handbags? Not my vibe—and definitely not my budget. Still, the older I get, the more I've realized that how you dress affects how you feel and how people see you (especially at work). As someone who basically lives in activewear (bless you, matching sets), I set a goal this year to level up my style. Not for the 'gram. Not to impress anyone. Just to feel polished walking into a client meeting or dinner with friends. I want my closet to feel like options—not panic. Here's what I've learned about upgrading your wardrobe without draining your bank account: 1. Invest in Great Basics Start with what you'll wear most: quality tees, well-fitting jeans, sleek trousers, a soft-but-structured button-down. Stick to mix-and-match neutrals. If you'll wear it 100 times, it's worth it. 2. Get a Blazer (or Two) The ultimate outfit elevator. Throw it over a tee and jeans for instant CEO energy. Check thrift shops or try Quince or M.M.LaFleur for chic staples on a not-too-spendy budget. 3. Find Stylish, Comfortable Shoes You don't need to suffer to serve looks. Vionic, Nisolo, and Everlane = comfort meets cute. 4. Try Clothing Rentals Armoire, Rent the Runway, or Nuuly let you try trends, shake up your style, or dress for events—without overcommitting (or overbuying). 5. Let Statement Pieces Shine Pair basics with one bold pop—think chunky necklace, bright heel, or printed pants. You don't need a closet full of drama to make a statement. 6. Thrift Like a Pro Thrifting = treasure hunting. Try local shops or go digital with Poshmark and ThredUp. Bonus: unload those forgotten Amazon returns for cash or swaps. 7. Tailor It Even budget buys can look high-end with a little tailoring. Find someone good and make your clothes actually fit you. 8. Swap with Friends Host a clothing swap. It's free, fun, and way more eco-friendly than a fast fashion binge. 9. Stick to a Budget Set a monthly or quarterly fashion budget. It keeps impulse buys in check and helps you plan for quality over quantity. 10. Follow Inspo That Fits You Fill your feed with stylists who get your style and your budget. Joanna turned me on to these accounts: @lifewithjazz & @hapatime (sisters) @shalicenoel @taliacupcake @marietrna You don't need a stylist or a shopping spree to refresh your wardrobe. With a few intentional choices, you can feel more put-together, confident, and stylish—without emptying your bank account. Start with the staples, mix in the fun, and keep it true to you. Thania (TA Content Mgr) MIDLIFE CARE     Midlife Isn't One-Size-Fits-All. Your Care Shouldn't Be Either.   Brain fog, surprise weight gain, mood swings for no reason—midlife symptoms are frustrating enough without being dismissed by your doctor. Midi specializes in women's midlife health, offering real support for what you're actually going through. 🙋‍♀️ They take your symptoms seriously. 🩺 They offer real solutions, not shrugs. 💻 And it's all done via telehealth, often covered by insurance. You're not just being dramatic. You're being heard. ➡️ Book your first visit today—and finally get the care you deserve. RECIPE OF THE WEEK Have a recipe you love? Share it here. STAFF PICKS Stuff We're Loving This Week   💌 Marketers, your inbox is missing out! Masters in Marketing delivers the insights you want—no jargon, just secrets behind viral campaigns. 📱Forget calorie counting—discover a proven path to weight loss. 🪟 These linen curtains are giving breezy, main-character mornings with zero effort. 🌟 Keep your brows on point with the best tinted gel for blonde gals, recommended by Cameron. JUST FOR FUN JOB LEADS   Your Next Gig = One Click Away ROI CX Solutions is hiring for a Content Creator (American Fork, UT). Grant, Genovese & Baratta, LLP is hiring for a Senior Corporate Paralegal (Irvine, CA). BGSF is hiring for a Technical Recruiter (Providence, RI). Cella is hiring for a Communications Manager (Houston, TX). H/Advisors Abernathy is hiring for a Senior Account Executive (Washington, DC). ⭐ View more jobs here > SPILL THE TEA Take Our Poll     Have more feedback? 💌 Reply to this email and tell us. ✨ P.S. Want more inspiration and positivity to kick off your week? Sign up for our Motivational Monday texts (U.S. only). 👀 Want to see if your company is a good fit for our 100k+ ambitious readers? Join our Sponsor Waitlist here. UPDATE YOUR PREFERENCES Only Get What You Want  Here's how to update your preferences in just a few quick steps: Click the link below and on the "Update Your Preferences" page, click the "Email me a link" button. Open the email with the subject line "The Assist Subscribers: Update Profile" and click the link inside. Choose the weekly email newsletters you'd like to receive from us (Tues, Wed, Thurs, Sat). Click "Update Preferences" to save your changes—and you're all set! 👉 Update my subscriber preferences here. Catch up on all Wellness Wednesday newsletter here. We send 4 emails a week — update which issues you receive at any time. Never want to hear from us again? Break our hearts and unsubscribe. Visit our Etsy shop for awesome templates. THE ASSIST, LOS ANGELES, CA 90045, UNITED STATES